Super discourage after Telling Employer

Found a super great job, similar to the field a studied in university. Been here for a few months, started to have a couple bad days with symptoms and flare ups. One day I just couldn’t handle it and called in sick. I told him I would talk with him about it on Monday (today), I told him that I had Chiari Malformation gave him the spark notes about the symptoms, and the just of it and why I took that sick day. His response to be was to basically as me if I was mentally disabled because I have a disformed brain, also if I’m going to have “bad” days that I should really think about not working.

Side note: I’ve taken one sick day. Even though I gift through my horrible symptoms daily to get through work.

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Hey Lora,
Sorry to say it like this but, to those uninformed (or uneducated) anything brain means mental. I found that it was easier not to say, even the so called ‘educated’ are very quick to place judgement, some wanting to treat me as if I was crippled. If I needed time off I had my dr simply write ‘Medical condition’ on the medical certificate, others don’t need to know in my opinion. That’s between me and my medical professional.

Merl from the Moderator Support Team

Yeah, I know. I had a whole “speech” planned but he had cornered me about a sick day I took. It took me by surprise, he seemed very open and understanding in the past. I wasn’t expecting him to react that way. Specially when I’ve told him I’ve been having some issues adjusting to working full time in a relatively boring field.

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Been were you are. You may want to consider filing fmla. Your pcp can list it intermediate and may need 1-3 days off. This should help him understand how severe chiari can be at times. It will also protect you, somewhat in keeping a position. Depending on if you state is a right to work state or not. In Florida employers can terminate your position for no reason whenever they want to.
Flma saved my job for 5 months then she found a reason to let me go. All I’m saying is fmla helped me for a few more months and made her work harder to get rid of me.
Good luck, but I suggest looking into family medical leave act.

While it is tempting to seek understanding and support from the workplace with both co-workers and bosses, I would strongly discourage that route. Missing one day of work does not require a full disclosure of medical information. Nor should it require an unspecific medical note.
When working with a chronic disease - deflect deflect deflect. “I was not feeling so great and thought it best to keep myself away from others” “I was just coming off something and decided to stay home”

Your manager now sees you with two negatives which does not make a positive! Having a brain problem and not getting along with full-time work. Best work on mending things with your boss but brush up on your resume as it is easy to be let go from work when you have just started. Advice from a workplace savvy co-worker (no need to divulge specifics) or friend or relative may assist in knowing exactly what steps to take.

Good luck with your job!

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Update: he fired me because my brain made me too “unpredictable”

So sorry to hear this.
It can be a real expensive route but you should be able to appeal it via the employment courts, that is if you want to. Even in appealing it some employers can make things so difficult after such an appeal that the work environment becomes a hostile environment. But in saying that, appealing is an option.

Merl from the Moderator Support Team

Seenie here from ModSupport, Lwahamaa

What a shame that your employer did what he did, without, I assume, a well-documented series of writeups, warnings, etc.

You’d only been in the job for a few months (it sounds like less than 6). I hope you’re going to be looking for something else. How about starting a new thread asking advice on dealing with applying for a job and dealing with employers when you have Chiari?

I’m sure there’s lots of advice to be had from people with experience here.

All the best to you



I’m so sorry your employer let you go that’s horrible. I have just decided yesterday to get the fmla paperwork from my job to have my dr fill out to safe guard myself if I need a day here or there. I’m a cna & it’s very demanding on my body & I’m super loyal so even if I’m suffering I do it in silence…i do my work & end up suffering even more. My symptoms have gotten worse & if I call “need” to call out I dont want the hassle. I hope you find a place of work that is more understanding. I know no one really works right now cuz of covid but my coworkers are great & they have given me great support as far as helping & just asking me if I’m ok.

Not sure where you live but if in a “right to work state” fmla may not save your job. That was my experience. I still got fired because I " could not perform my job duties any more". Prayers for you.

At this point we are always so short staffed I don’t think they’d fire me. I don’t really take any time off because I don’t want my residents to suffer. I guess I’d rather be the one to suffer lol. Its just so hard because when we are fully staffed its not too bad its just when I’m doing the work of 2 people that I struggle most. I get a lot of head pain when bending over etc but I try to breath through it. I’m going to talk to my employer though & find out what the fmla really does for me.