So heartbroken- surgery in 5 days

All I can do is cry lately. I don’t cry in front of my daughter because I don’t want her to be scared. It just KILLS me to think about my little girl in ICU, hooked up to machines. It breaks my heart to imagine her in so much pain and having her head sliced open. As the day get closer, I freak out more and more. My little girl,that I once carried in my stomach, will be in so much pain and there’s nothing I can do about it. Even though she’s 17, in my eyes she’s still my little girl. She’s so kind hearted and empathic. She’s always there to help others no matter how her chiari is acting up. I wonder if the same ppl that she helps will be there for her. Will her hair grow back before senior prom? Lol I have truly lost it! I know that everything will be fine. It’s just the road to becoming fine, that bothers me so much! Are there any patents who can offer me any advice? How did you keep your cool? What was the 1st day post op like?

(stupid touchscreen)

It's going 2 b fine. I havent had my surgry yet and we dont know if we're going 2 have it. My moms in your place. I'm even younger than yr daughter by 5 years. I dont know what 2 say but its going 2 b fine.

Dearest Tonya:

No matter how old are kids are...they are still our babies.....she will do just fine...From all i have read and from my own nieces experience(which was very recently) the younger folks seem to do much better recovering.

My niece has hers done about 8 weeks ago and went back to work this past Wed!! I just spoke with her the other day and she is feeling 'great'..her words..she told me she was tired after working all day but other than that..all is well..she is 23.

As far as her hair....I am fairly certain her hair will grow back way in time for prom.

Hang in there. We are here for you.



She is going to come through the surgery like a trooper. She is a strong young woman who has the support of a loving mother. Even if her hair doesn't grow back before senior prom she will still be pretty as a picture. Be strong Mom.


I had surgery at the end of Sept. I'm almost 25 years old and my Mom came to stay with me while I had surgery and then moved me home to her house. My surgery was super successful and the nurses kept me really comfortable. I didn't really have a lot of pain... other than my back being sore from how they had to position me for the surgery. But they will bring you heating pads or ice packs if you want them. I'm now 9 weeks post op and I'm feeling good. I have more muscle pain than anything else, my incision site hurts sometimes but that's my body going "im allivveeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!" I've been taking tylenol for back pain which is doing wonders for my pain.

When I was discharged from the hospital they gave me 10 days worth of pain killers and muscle relaxants and I didn't even use all of them... those 10 days worth of pills lasted me almost until the end of October.

I'm sure your daughter will be fine. If she can handle the evil headaches from chiari, surgery and recovery will be a breeze!

It has to be hard but be strong for her!!! She will do great. A 10 year old in my daughters class had surgery 2 weeks before me. His mom said at 2 weeks she couldn’t keep him down. If your daughter has made it with Chiari symptoms she will handle the surgery fine.

You will be able to stay by her side in ICU. Be her advocate. If she’s hurting or nauseated tell the nurses!!! I felt crappy in ICU but never thought that I hadn’t made the right decision.

Hang in there!!!

My 5year old had surgery on Dec 5th and was discharged on the 9th. His pain is now controlled with only Tylenol and motrin. I was amazed! He has not had any other pain meds since the 8th. I was scared to death the week before and almost thought about canceling it. I am so glad I did not. I would say it is completely understandable to be scared right now. Any good momma would be. This group helped me through it and my church family were amazing. They had a special prayer for our family, drove 3 hours to the hospital to be with us, and provided us with food, snacks, and activities during our stay. Having a group of people there for you helps! We are all there for you!!!


I just had my decompression surgery, and will be three weeks post-op this Wednesday. The one thing that really got my family through was our faith in Christ. I'm not sure how, but I made it all the way to when they called my name for preparation without crying since the first neurosurgeon I visited told me I needed the operation. After that my next tears were absolutely from joy when I woke up in recovery symptom free from my Chiari.

I had so many Prayer Warriors, an amazing Lord who is still carrying me through all this and a good, positive outlook. My neurosurgeon is amazed at how quickly and smoothly my recovery is going. I had the most durastic and severe decompression surgery that neurosurgeons will perform, and my neurosurgeon credits all of those things, plus a supportive family, wonderful friends, and a fantastic boyfriend. It sounds like your daughter has a great relationship with you, and I"m sure that will get her through.

My first day pre-op...well....I don't remember it too well. Like I said I woke up in recovery symptom free, they had me on a self-administered pain pump that kept my pain under control, so I wasn't in any pain. The biggest thing was that I couldn't hold food down. I vomited a lot, and slept even more. At first I slept as much as possible, pretty much anytime they weren't poking or prodding me in the hospital. They will make sure she has her pain under control before leaving the hospital....don't worry about that. They'll work with her to make sure she is comfortable. I hope she has the best experience possible! Just think, the countdown is on until no more Chiari symptoms! :)

Tonya, you and your daughter and her neurosurgeon will be in my prayers now and throughout her recovery. Please know I'm here for you if you have any questions or want any advice. I'm going through my recovery now, and will help you whenever you need it! HANG IN THERE and keep your chin up! We're all here for you!

God Bless,



I cannot believe you are already go, girl!!! See, everyone recovers at a different rate of speed...

Sherry...Hugs and prayers to you and your daughter.....please let us know how you all are.



Hi Typo Master here!!

I meant to say Sherry..I cannot believe you are home so soon!!

Tonya...thru the Grace of God and the experienced docs...your girl will do great...Look at Sherry...oh, Lord, she is OLD...LOL and is already home!!!

Sherry, that was a joke..ya know 'bout being are great!!! Thanks for your input.



Sometimes our children are stronger than we ever imagined! I had my surgery April 28 and my daughter graduated from high school on June 6th! My hair had grown back for the most part and I made it to the graduation and festivities! Your daughter is young and will bounce back even quicker than I did! I was 46 when I had mine. LOL! She will look absolutely beautiful for prom.

The first couple of days after surgery will be rough, I won't lie to you. The nursing staff will do all they can do to keep her as comfortable as possible. She will sleep alot and that's a good thing. The only machines will be blood pressure, pulse, temp, that sort of thing. She will be breathing on her own and there will not be that much equipment. You will be bringing her back home in no time :)

Rest easy, Mom!