I just need to vent a little

I’m physically and emotionally drained:( I’ve been crying almost constantly for the last 24 hours, which makes my head, neck, back, and shoulders hurt even more than they normally do:( I desperately need my luck to change and in the meantime, I need those who are supposed to care about me to stop making me feel like crap. Is that too much to ask? I should probably be use to this by now, but everything was getting to me today. I use to be the “strong one” in my family…now, I’m just a burden and they never let me forget it. I’m struggling to find reasons why the world wouldn’t be better off without me. I would never act on this, but I can’t help how I feel. I’m sorry for being such a downer, but I just needed to let some of that out. Thanks for listening and letting me vent a little.


Dear Crystal......

Thank you for sharing your feelings with us....It is hard to do sometimes, ya know...

This is the place to come to let it out and vent...Lord knows, I constantly come here for you guys to pull me up when I am so down I don't think I'll ever get up.

It is hard for family to see us ill I think and in my case my family sometimes comes off as flat out disgusted with me...which in turn makes me feel like a loser...but I am NOT...and EITHER ARE YOU!!!! You are SUFFERING!!!!!! Does that make you a burden??? NO!!!!!!

They probably don't know what to do or say ...they know they cannot fix you..so they in turn are angry...not at you..but the situation....Just a thought..what do you think???

It is weird how life works sometimes...I want my family to accept me as me and my limitations...and there are many times I cry ..wondering.."What the hell is wrong with these people???" They just don't get it. But I cannot change them..as much as I'd LOVE TO!!!!! I always figured family would be the most commpassionate.....NOT ALWAYS!!!

SO....For me, anyway..I get my support here...from you, Crystal and the whole gang. This is where to be YOU...You are not a downer...you are going through a rough time...It will get better...hang on to that hope....easier said than done...Sweet Jesus, do I know that!!!

Please let us know how you are doing today...PLEASE.

We are here for you.




We will never be the person we were before CM destroyed our lives and who we thought we were. I try daily to embrace my new life and it usually doesn't workout so good. It is almost like we have to mourn who we were, and let that person go & rise from the ashes a new person. I would go crazy thinking about what I used to do and can't now. Know I am crying with you. You are a wonderful person. Please give yourself a break. Vent here anytime....You are truly cared about here. You can call me anytime 804-■■■■■■■■. I am usually at home. You really aren't alone.

Thinking about you & praying for you,


Thank you Katie, Lori, and Tracy:) Your kind and encouraging words mean alot to me. I don’t know what I would do without you guys. Sorry, I took so long to get back to you all. I had to work today, which was probably the best thing for me. It’s hard on me physically, but I needed to get out of my house and get my mind off things. Thank you all again for listening and caring.