I’m in marching band, and marched my first game on Friday. I have been missing rehearsals/sitting out for some of them because I had my surgery in April and I am still recovering. I know my movements, I know where to go. I had to the pretty much the same last year, since I dislocated my knee last year, and I still managed the entire season.
But this game, I struggled a lot, because the cerebellum affects my muscle memory, and I just recently had surgery not to long ago. I did great considering that, during the marching. I hit my spots the best I could, and so on so fourth. But, after the game, two girls in my trombone section were basically telling me that I shouldn’t have even been there since I haven’t been as attended to rehearsals. They are aware of my surgery, and them saying that really hurt. I feel like crying right now but I won’t. My section leader said I did fine, and things like that. But, them saying that really made me cry and get sad because I know I could’ve done better, it wasn’t my choice.
It is simply just something they can’t understand. My movements were slightly delayed, and my body wouldn’t move despite me knowing where I needed to go, but I always ended up where I was supposed to. My brain just doesn’t work as easy as it used to. So that’s all I am upset about right now. I don’t really know what to do about it, but stay motivated and positive like I have been trying to do. Maybe I should try to explain my condition more to some people in my section, but I am not so sure? But that’s how life is going for me right now.
-Sublime