Surgery is in less than 5 weeks and I was getting mentally prepared, then Wednesday we lost a friend who died during a surgery ( unrelated to ACM)… But I am freaked out non the less. Tomorrow and Monday we say goodbye to a good guy, awesome father and hsband and the man that always pulled everyone out of the dumps on days like this. I’ll have to look at his 6 year and 8 month old and know they will never know their awesome father. Last night I didn’t sleep well and my 10 year old woke me at 5:30 Am to stop me from crying and yelling in my sleep. I had a migraine and my Chiari headaches all day, and my oldest acted up all day. I really want to go to sleep but can’t. I need to go to church tomorrow, but don’t want to cry through the whole service like I did 2 weeks ago because every time I heard something touching I was thinking that it might be nice for my funeral if something goes wrong…Sorry for the doom and gloom, just very depressed and weepy tonight and needed to vent…thanks everyone for sharing and giving me a place to let it all out…keeping you all in my prayers!
I am so sorry you are having such a bad day. Sometimes the pain is just so awful and the confusion and dizziness just add the feeling of being overwhelmed. I will pray for you. I hope your surgery is a huge success!!! I also know about the older kids acting up. I have two teen girls that can trigger a migraine faster than you can blink with all their fighting. It is so hard. Many many hugs.
Thanks 
I’M SORRY TO HEAR THAT YOU HAD A BAD DAY BUT WITH CHIARI SEEM LIKE THE SMALLEST THING AFFECT US MORE AND WE SEEM TO GET DEPRESSED BECAUSE WE ARE ALWAYS IN PAIN AND NO ONE UNDERSTAND WHAT WE GO THROUGH AND REALLY DON’T SHOW MUCH SUPPORT. BUT WE ARE HEAR TO LISTEN TO YOU NO MATTER WHAT SO FEEL FREE TO VENT ANYTIME YOU LIKE.
I am so sorry for you loss. Allow yourself yo cry and grieve...what a tragic thing..he must have been young...I hope you knowing he is in Gods loving arms gives you some peace.
I know that when I am emotional for whatever reason..my symptoms get so much worse....the H/A's are the worst.
I pray you get some well needed sleep tonight. It IS going to be a rough couple of days/weeks..whatever time it is...a loss of a loved one is really hard, to say the least.
Let us help you ....if you need a shoulder to cry on..we are here for you.
Lori
Thanks Ladies!
Hang in there!!! Sorry for the loss. Vent to me anytime.
Hugs. Hopefully after your surgery you’ll feel much better.
First off, sorry for your loss. Secondly, bad days happen. I have had a few surgeries and did the decompression on August 4th. I am good.
Just think positive. I really believe the more you can make yourself happy about it, the quicker you will be better. I went through some of the emotions that you are going through.
I remember worrying about it, deciding if I should go through with it… Then it hit me. What if I don’t do the surgery? I am prolonging the inevitable after all. Why be in constant pain? Why live with paralysis on the right side of my body, muscle weakness, ect?
Finally, it made sense. I had the surgery, the following day post op - I could feel my body again and no headache for the first time in 5 years. I hope that I am giving you hope. Please know that the 5 weeks will fly by and you will be ready.
We will all be praying for you and you will be fine.
Hugs,
Tina
First off, I am so, so sorry for your loss! Prayers are for you and his family. I can also tell you that I work in the OR and I have seen so many surgeries that have gone off flawless. I was terrified about this, because I've witness the most complicated surgeries go so smooth and I have seen the ones that were so simple go wrong. But out of the thousands of surgeries I have been in, I've only seen 2 go wrong. You have to have faith that everyone in that OR suite knows what they are doing. We do it everyday! You're fears are legitamate, but you have to let it go. I was so scared leading up to the surgery and the day of I was so calm and I walked into the preop area and I said "I get to have surgery today" yeah they looked at me like I was crazy, but I said it with a smile.
Yes it will be sad to say goodbye to your friend, and yes those thoughts will be with you all the time now, but think of it this way, you now have one more person looking out for you up there. I'm sure you will do fine, let go and let God! You can always vent to me anyday if you want.
BTW, it's not as bad as you might think. I am 2 weeks post-op, I pretty much have full range of motion in my neck and my headaches are gone now for 3 days straight. I still get my dizzy spells if I am over working it, but my doctor said that it will take about 3 months to feel the full affect. He explained it like this..."We've lived with these symptoms and feelings all our life, so after surgery it's like say someone went into your house while you were gone, tore down some walls and rearranged your furniture, it's going to take some time to get used to the new space we have in there." I'm pretty much symptom free now. And I am going back to work in 2 1/2 weeks. I wish nothing but the best for you and I will be praying for you lots!
Hugs!
Amber
Thanks again…it was hard but time to move forward ( as I sit here crying). I have had 10 surgeries, 9 for ears, and 1 unrelated…so I have been through it before, but this is my brain, and Steve went in thinking nothing could go wrong, but it did.
So I am just a neurotic mess, that when I start talking to God it comes out" why me" instead of " be with me" luckily I know that God is right here with me and understands what’s in my heart. And I do want to be better, so onward we go!
It is hard because it is your brain! I went through something like that prior to surgery. I can only talk from my experience, but you will be ok. I asked God the same thing. I did get a reply... sometimes certain people are picked to show others your strength. And sometimes, it is for us to see that it could be worse.
God is with you chica. Just hang in there. All of us are praying for you :) Hope this helps