The unknown is a place you never have been before. I never experienced sleepness nights, bottomless tears, waves of pain through the back of my head, forgetfulness before this. What is wrong with me? Is there something wrong with me? YES! There is something wrong. I know I need to check these papers for my second graders but I can’t seem to pull it together. I feel like a mouse on a wheel. It scares me. I’m doing the best I can. How do I continue to work as a teacher like this. This place is so new to me. This is such an unknown place.
Cocoa, I’m sorry your feeling scared, it’s such a hard place to be. This is a very scary thing- not knowing what’s going to happen, and not quite recognizing yourself. I can relate, so even though this is a crappy place to be at least you have a few nice neighbors:)kidding aside though, I think you have to just keep doing the best you can, cut yourself some extra slack, and keep the hope that as you make your way through your journey things will get better.
Hugs,
Jenn
Dear Heavenly Father, I come to you this morning as your faithful servant, Father I ask that Cocoa be lifted up to you and all your grace! I ask that you send an Angel to be with her on those sleepless nights and when she’s in pain and confused! I ask you Lord to be with her, to comfort her and to let her know that she is not alone. Give her peace and rest for she is a child of the most high God, she is your child Lord. You paid the price for all of us Lord on the cross, and by your stripes Cocoa will find peace and healing…in your mighty name we pray…AMEN!!!
Cocoa I don’t have any answers as to why any of us have to go through this, but I do know that God has a plan for each and every one of us! Keep giving it your best and find a great NS, it’s a battle and a rough road but I hear you! I was and still am in the same boat that you are! Sometimes I fell like I’m losing my mind, just hang in there and Jenn is right, cut yourself some slack, you’ll pull through, we’re praying for you! God bless!
Shay
VetDad..what a beautiful prayer!
Cocoa...I know first hand what you are talking about...though, not a teacher...when I was working with so many problems..I felt much like you were describing ..
Have you had a consult with a neurosurgeon to see what your options are? There are medications that can help with the pain..naturally, all have some side effects..so you would have to weigh it all out.
The forgetfulness is very upsetting, I know...I still have to write lists...
Does your principal know what you are dealing with? Maybe you could get some help with grading papers, ect??? Is that possible?
Please keep us posted on how you are doing.
Take care,,
Lori
Please be kind to yourself. I know the fear and stress you are feeling and I am sorry. most of us has either been there or are there now or visit occasionally.
The Unknown is Scary, but you aren’t alone. I wish I could give you a hug. I know exactly what you are feeling.
Please know you can talk to us about anything. You really are among people that understand.
I will keep you in my prayers,
Tracy Z.
Wow! You all truly are amazing. Thank you so much for your prayers and words of encouragement. The Lord is truly amazing and does answer prayer. My sister popped up over my house today and offered to come over every Thursday and check papers for me. :-)I have another MRI scheduled for Thursday and I meet with my NS next Tuesday.
VETDad as I read your prayer I couldn’t do anything but cry in thankfulness because I knew that God loved me and sent those words just for me. Thank you for allowing God to use you.
I am so grateful for all of you. It means so much to me that there are people who know what I’m going through and don’t mind sharing their experiences. It truly is therapy. Thank you.
You are so very welcomed, you are added to my prayer list! I have done 7 tours of duty in Africa, Iraq, and Afghanistan…now I fight for our Lord, and all of you! All my love!
Shay
Thank you for your beautiful prayer that you wrote! This is so fitting for me to read as I am battling through a rough night with sleeplessness, headaches, and dizziness! God is truly in our corner and this helped to remind me even when I am feeling alone the Lord is walking and then sometimes carrying me through this journey. God Bless you!
VetDad said:
Dear Heavenly Father, I come to you this morning as your faithful servant, Father I ask that Cocoa be lifted up to you and all your grace! I ask that you send an Angel to be with her on those sleepless nights and when she's in pain and confused! I ask you Lord to be with her, to comfort her and to let her know that she is not alone. Give her peace and rest for she is a child of the most high God, she is your child Lord. You paid the price for all of us Lord on the cross, and by your stripes Cocoa will find peace and healing...in your mighty name we pray...AMEN!!!
Cocoa I don't have any answers as to why any of us have to go through this, but I do know that God has a plan for each and every one of us! Keep giving it your best and find a great NS, it's a battle and a rough road but I hear you! I was and still am in the same boat that you are! Sometimes I fell like I'm losing my mind, just hang in there and Jenn is right, cut yourself some slack, you'll pull through, we're praying for you! God bless!
Shay
WOW I remember this feeling. It was like I was placee in a huge room with no one there. No one to explain why am I here and where am I. I still have this feeling at times. Working became more and more difficult. Co-workers would say "you're in pain, I see it all over your face". Most people have enough work on their plate. No way could they take some of mine. I filed disability and the judge rendered a bench decision an awarded it to me on the spot. I was told surgery is needed but will not do that. I had stomach surgery for ulcers which turned into 2 years of surgery because of complications. I won't go there with my brain. I pray you and all of us find relieve from pain and the pressure life puts on us. God Bless.
How are you doing Cocoa?